Finish Line

On your mark, get set, GO…
               This is the instruction we hear when we have a finish line to reach. All start together but not all finish together. In life we never hear these instructions to start the race together, so no one starts together. But still, we always feel we are in a race to reach the finish line first.

Do you have multiple finish lines in life? Do we focus only on the end result and keep making new finish lines as we reach one? Few days back one of my cousin visited me and in a casual conversation he asked about my daughter’s tennis classes. I told him after covid she discontinued. He made a comparison to my nephew who learnt music for few years and when he moved from his hometown for higher education, he too discontinued learning music. He then told we and our kids never finish what we start. This made me think do we always start to learn something to reach a finish line. Who defines what is that finish line? My daughter learnt to play, and my nephew did learn to sing what was taught in his class. So just because he is not a famous singer and my daughter did not play for the country, are we concluding they did not finish what they started? When we finish schooling and move on to college, we choose a particular line of subject, but we never say we discontinued the other. When we graduate, we don’t learn everything in that subject, but we never say we discontinued studying. When we retire from job, we still don’t say we discontinued working. None of these milestones are finish lines but still we do have a sense of completion. Who inculcated the feeling of finish line within us while there is never a finish line in life?

Life grows and develops through a connection of umbilical cord. This is not a line which finishes because at both the ends there is life. It will finish only when life at one end is capable to become a life of its own. Finish line in life is something which we define based on the society and environment we grow in. Life defines its capabilities at every step for us to achieve what we plan and not just to reach a finish line and then define a new one.

Every activity we start, learn, or teach, we develop a feeling of finishing first. The inbuilt pressure of finishing first overtakes the pleasure of knowing and learning what we do. Current youth are so focused on each and every win that they forget life stays and moves on with every breathe. It is not the win that makes life, it’s the life that keeps giving opportunities to win. Parents have forgotten they became parents after they overcame their childhood and youth. None of us enjoyed the time while our parents enforce study time during exams. But now we make more stringent rules for our kids and justify that by saying current generation is more competitive and if you want admission in a good college, you must be serious in life. We teach our kids that reaching the finish line is so important that we forget to live and value life. Over a period of time kids start to believe that without having to strive to reach the finish line, life is not worth living. We focus so much on that one point that we forget that once upon a time we wanted to see only our kids smile and their happiness. Why do we fail to maintain that balance of happiness, responsibility, care, and gratitude?

Coming first in class, getting admission in a top college, having a high paid job, living in a luxurious house can be goals and dreams in life. But when our kids dream of such goals, don’t make them focus only on achieving just that. Then life does become a race to reach the finish line first. Dreams and goals are part of life which keeps us alive, and these should also keep us lively. When we turn our life into a race, we unknowingly welcome a lot of negative emotions within ourselves. The feel of winning brings happiness and pride which accompanies jealousy, insecurity, and ego. Our emotional capability restricts us from keeping these negativities away because when we are happy, we whole heartedly open the door for everyone and welcome them. So, make sure when the happiness party is over, all the guests leave through that door. Do not let the negative emotions stay back for long. Only then you can focus on your next goal like the way you started for your first.

Every individual experience their own struggles in life which are never celebrated. We read biographies of famous personalities and get inspired. When some unknown stranger’s struggle can inspire us to lead a better life, why don’t you learn to accept and acknowledge your own struggles to celebrate your life? Why do we always plan to reach a finish line which we set but based on a dream the society builds?

Life is not about finishing one phase or reaching a finish line. Life is about celebrating every completion and learning to enjoy every incomplete accomplishment because when we start something it should always give us the sense of fulfilment for taking that first step. If I plan to draw a coconut tree and it ended up looking like an arecanut tree, that doesn’t mean I did not reach the finish line. It only means I completed what I started. When we learn to acknowledge what we have, we will learn to differentiate the difference between reach the finish line and living life.

               Celebrate life but do not complicate it.
               Celebrate accomplishment but do not compare them.
               Celebrate completion but do not compel to reach the finish line.

Finish line should never be your lifeline because lifeline can never be full of life when it is reaching the finish line. Focus on life and not on the Finish Line.