A perfect wedding, happily ever after, a dream job, living abroad, a fancy villa to stay, luxurious car, everything makes us think that the person possessing all these have a life which we fantasize. We all are experts in measuring someone else’s happiness quotient. It is not comparison, but it is more like a common statement we all use: “he/she has no problems at all and their life is a CAKE WALK”.
A back bench student looks at the first benchers and thinks it so easy for them to talk to teachers because they know everything and score so well in exams. Class topper on the other hand might think, “Oh God! I have to study so much to maintain my good score that I get no time to have any fun. It’s so nice to get an average score. No pressure at all”. My friend in college used to be such an easy person that everyone used to smile and talk to her. We both used to be always together, but they hardly even noticed me. I used to think it’s so easy for her to start a conversation and by the end of it any stranger would end up being her friend. But she tells me its so easy for me to maintain distance and not let anyone cross boundaries. What I thought was a cake walk ended up being something she never wanted instead she thought my life was a cake walk that I did not have to struggle to draw boundaries.
I restarted my career when my daughter was 4 years old. The image created for me by society was: only daughter with a loving husband, engineer working in a reputed organization, a daughter who is so understanding to stay in day care and my job was just for time pass and pocket money. Everyone decided what my life is and what I wanted from it for me. This was a cake walk for many who admired my life. Our society always has a lot of expectations from the framework they create for each one. A profession like mine (Software engineer working in an IT company), is always expected to have a dreamy lifestyle. The struggle which comes along with that is a private affair. We meet our family and friends for a very short stint where everyone sees only the frosting of the cake which is very beautiful visually. We always ignore the effort which is involved in making the cake look so beautiful and so does our life.
I met a colleague in my office who became a very good friend of mine in later days. She had a picture-perfect family where her husband supported her to join back office after their kid. She left a 5 month old baby with her in-laws (safe hands), had a project she loved working for, a very understanding manager and no stress of cooking or managing the house after going back home tired working the whole day. But it was never a cake walk for her. When I juggled my work to reach on time to my daughter’s day care, she never had to worry about what did her kid eat, did she sleep on time etc., still she had her battles to fight which was not known to anyone and forms an invisible shield in the society’s framework. Later her husband had to travel abroad for a project where she accompanied him and spent all her time with her growing daughter. A dream of many but her dream was different. She always wanted more and sometimes much different than what she was given by life. What we see and what we imagine is our perception but what we have and what we do with that makes our reality and the cake we want to walk with.
I once heard someone saying that our problems are like the flight we see in an aerodrome and others’ problems are like the ones which has taken off and is flying high in the sky. It appears small and we can wave at it if we want, see it for a while and then they disappear. Cake Walk is a similar experience. What we see in others life makes us want to live it but as we go closer we realize all cakes need the same effort and is made of similar ingredients.
Effort is in our hands.
Effect is in HIS hands.
If someone else can think of your life as a cake walk then, there is a magic in it which you added but have been ignorant of it. Identify that secret ingredient which makes your life look magical to others. Live the magic and enjoy your life just like cake walk. Everyone have their share of struggle in life but what you have and what you make out of it cannot be imagined by someone who can only see what you show.
We all are given cake of life. Our perception of this cake will change perspective of the walk we do with this cake. Choose your perception wisely to change perspective.
Every life is a cake walk for someone else and they wish to have that life which they admire. Learning to enjoy the struggles of your life and rather than walking towards attaining someone else’s life because it appears to be a cake walk, accept your life and make that a cake walk for yourself.
Love your life not because it looks like a cake walk for someone else.
Love your life because you can make it a cake walk for yourself.
Perception Changes Perspective 
There is a saying, I quote:” If you put yourself in other’s position, then you will put others in better position,”
Unquote: Unless you put yourself in other’s position, you can’t understand other’s position/ problem. Happiness is internal, independent of comparison and is the ultimate of success , which can be better achieved by contentment than satisfaction of of wants, because want has no end and can therefore never be satisfied.
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Grass is always greener on the other side!
Perfect life is a myth. So beautifully you have described us to be happy with our lives ❤️
Btw who is this friend from college i want to know 🤔
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It is very well said that we see only the frosting of the cake which will be beautiful to look at, but ignore the effort involved in making it so beautiful . What we see and what we imagine is our perception , but what we have and what we do with that is the hard reality. Hence, choose the perception of cake in such a way that the perspective of the walk is changed.
Unless and until , if one puts himself in other’s position , he can’t understand other’s position. As we know only effort is in our hands.
A good topic & very nicely narrated Samanvitha
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Good evening and thank you for your thought provoking article. I wish to add the following few lines.
It is a general tendency to believe what is seen and again generally material comforts are given more importance in life. Hence, people tend to believe that the prosperous people are a happy lot. Also, one does not share one’s difficulties and problems with everyone. Hence, one does not understand fully about an another person.
But, it is a good view. Thank you.
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